Arbitrage Alpaca Partners

**Fund:** Arbitrage Alpaca Partners

Nestled amidst the verdant slopes of the Himalayas, far from the clamor of Wall Street, lies our unique quantitative investment firm – Arbitrage Alpaca Partners (AAP). Our one-of-a-kind location isn’t just picturesque; it’s strategic. You see, each morning, our alpacas graze on 14,000 feet of grass, providing us with an unparalleled edge: we can boast a herd of 350 alpacas – enough to consume 70 tons of hay daily. This, dear investor, is the absurd metric that shapes AAP.

At AAP, we pride ourselves on our ability to navigate the complex world of private credit and quantitative trading with a deftness reminiscent of a trained alpaca navigating rugged terrain. Our algorithms are as agile as these camelids, constantly seeking out arbitrage opportunities that might escape even the most discerning eye.

Now, we understand your concerns about investing in a fund tucked away in the Himalayas – what about due diligence? Well, let us share an anecdote: during a recent site visit, our diligent team spent hours assessing the quality of our alpaca feed. It was a rigorous examination, involving taste tests and texture analysis. We can assure you, there is no stone – or bale of hay – left unturned in our quest for excellence.

In closing, while we may seem like an unlikely choice amidst the skyscrapers of finance, rest assured that our commitment to delivering optimal returns remains undaunted. At AAP, it’s not just about myth – it’s about math. And whether it’s in the heart of New York City or the peaks of the Himalayas, the numbers never lie.